Gratitude because.....

“We count our miseries carefully,
and accept our blessings without much thought."
~ Chinese Proverb

I have met countless people who can describe in detail why something is unpleasant for them, why something isn’t working or what is going wrong in their life, and yet their gratitude is only a single word or short phrase. Does being able to explain in detail the reason why you have gratitude for something make a difference in the energy behind it? I went on a quest for answers.

Some people I talked with had long laundry lists of gratitude,but they seemed to talk more about their problems and complaints. Others had shorter lists, and shared beautiful stories with me about each items on their list.

I met people who had similar items on their gratitude list and different responses to my question: “you are grateful for this because…..?”

One woman I met with had written “I am thankful for my health” on her gratitude list. When I asked her “You are grateful for your health because…..”, her answer was a sharp: “Well! Because I just am, and I am insulted to be asked why!.” It reminded me of when my parents would tell me do to something and when I asked why I heard: ” because I said so”. This answer didn’t help me to understand.

In contrast, I met with Nancy who also had written on her list “I am thankful for my health”. When I asked “she was grateful because….” what she told me was: “I am thankful I have my health, because that means I can take care of my kids. I brought these beautiful children in the world and they depend on me. When I have my health I can enjoy them and take care of them. And that make me feel such a deep feeling for love and life, that I call that a grateful feeling.” In order to feel the depth of her gratitude Nancy believes that she must be willing to know why she feels gratitude. Anything less, to her, is simply lip service.

I find that every time I do this exercise I find new feelings around each incident I list in Gratitude. Several other people shared with me how doing this exercise made a difference in their feelings of gratitude.

“He who knows others is learned;
He who knows himself is wise.”
~ Lao-tzu, Tao te Ching

For this Thanksgiving season, do this for yourself and see if there is any difference in the depth of your feelings of Gratitude.

Write down a few things on that you are Grateful for.
And then continue the sentence with: because…..|
See what you can discover with your because.

"The important thing is not to stop questioning our reasons
Never lose a holy curiosity.”
~ Albert Einstein

(c) 2009 excerpt from book: Stress Out, show stress who's the boss

Focus on the reasons to complain = stress

Focus on the reasons for gratitude = happy

More happy = less stress

www.StressOut-book.com

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Is price important?

Q. I am writing my list of desires. The first thing on my list is a new car, however I do not have any idea of where the money will come from for the car so I am not sure if I should put down a price for the new car or not. Could I write down free for the price of the car or do I really to put down a amount?

A. Since I don’t know you, I can only answer this in generalities.

One key to whether or not you should write “free” next to the car you desire is how you feel when you write that. Do you feel that getting this car for free is the only way you will ever get it, or do you have a deep core belief that you can only get "what you work hard and pay for yourself". One similar internal message, “if you want it done right you must do it yourself.”

The lottery is played by millions of people every day who have a belief that the only way they will ever have financial success is to win the lottery. Their internal beliefs of worthiness are in their feelings of self worth, their abilities, their confidence, etc.. This is why, when some people win the lottery, they are worse off financially only a few years later.

Many people discover that when they write their List of Desires, they are really focusing on why they can’t have it; or because of their internal beliefs, they have limiting thoughts that this (whatever it is) can only come one way.

Well known author Cheryl Richardson shares how wrote that she wanted to travel and she added “for free”. She had no energy on any other specifics of where or with whom. It resulted in her being asked by a friend to be her travel companion on a trip that she had won through her business accomplishments. When Cheryl wrote this, she was already feeling self confident and worthy of many things in her life.

If you write a description of the car – make, model, year, color, condition – and you see yourself driving the car, the price of the car may be of no consideration. Unless the price of the car is connected to your feelings of worthiness – a certain price car to show the world (or yourself) you are worthy.

If you feel unworthy of owning this car, then you need to address your opinions and conscious and unconscious beliefs as to why you believe you are unworthy. We can say we are worthy, however, our deep core beliefs will tell us the truth and have an effect on the results.

Writing down your List of Desires in detailed description, you are opening the pathway to receive from any direction. The key is to keep the picture of having it clearly in your mind without barriers.

So when you write down this car, what feelings do you get when you write it’s price, vs, what do you feel when you write “free”?

If the price continues in your thoughts and you are questioning it, it is important.The price is a message or a belief you have which will effect the outcome.

Wishing you awesome success,

Networking Miracle

My friend Michelle is focused on opening a spiritual spa in Costa Rico. She sent me this update. Her commitment and her faith in her Spiritual support may be an inspiration to others so I am sharing her words here:

I was attending my monthly business networking meeting held at various local businesses. This meeting was hosted by a deluxe assisted living facility in Venice. The first miracle was the luxurious spread they provided us for breakfast complete with chefs making our custom omelets to the beautifully carved ice sculpture.

Every meeting there is a drawing from the business cards for lovely prizes. Often they are things/services that I’m not interested in and I wish them for the person whose life will be enhanced most in receiving them. However, on numerous occasions there are prizes I desire and I say, “That’s mine” or “I want that!” Yes, they’ve picked my card 99% of the time that happens. Today I wanted a gift for a very silly reason. I wanted the gift bag it was it. The bag was all sparkly and pretty and I’d run out of bags to gift people things in. The prize happened to be a bottle of wine (not something I’m big on) and a bottle stopper with a beautiful silver heart….the heart will stay with me for a while

Everyone gets a chance to stand up, introduce themselves and their businesses. I stood up and said, “For all those who have been following my Spa Retreat progress…..manifestation, I thought it was Costa Rica but recently Panama has been presenting more powerfully. If anyone has any leads or ideas, please let me know.”

At the end of the meeting, a gal who worked at the assisted living facility, Julie *, came up to me and said, “I live in Panama”. She has homes here and there. She asked what areas I was considering. Trying not to be too specific and open, I said, “kind of around the west side, near Costa Rica.” Julie says, “I live in Bocas Del Toro.” She couldn’t help but notice my eyes getting bigger than saucers. Bocas Del Tor has been in my mind for months. Bocas info and pictures were on my desk that very moment. She said she could connect me with the various spas around and I could stay at her apartment. We agreed to get together later that evening at her place.

So I’m going to my new angel’s place to talk business and possibilities. Lo and behold, thanks to my morning’s winnings, I even have a gift to bring….a lovely bottle of wine! I arrive at Julie’s condo right at the beach on Venice Island and her husband Dan* answers the door. It was kind of interesting as he is all dressed up….in swim trunks! As I enter I see she is wearing a bathing suit herself. I’m thinking, “She’s totally comfortable in the midst of luxury and totally down to earth too – I like these people!” My first feelings couldn’t have been more right. We talked and laughed for hours feeling like we’d known and loved each other forever.

Turns they have all the connections I could possibly dream of in Panama. Dan is in construction and knows about properties, building and dealing with “the system”. Julie has holistic training, knows how to go into the rainforest to get plants for cooking and healing. She gave me some soap she made that smelled good enough to eat. She showed me her hand-crafted jewelry made from sharks teeth and shells. Layer after delightful layer of complimentary information unfolded.

So, I had all sorts of choices. I could go now, stay at their place and flounder on my own…..not good timing anyway (legal stuff not quite finished here). I could go with Dan in August when he prepares the way for Julie’s effortless arrival. Or I could go with Julie in September effortlessly flying in with her. I won’t need to know how to call a taxi or even where my apartment is. I’ll just have an Angel to guide me around, show me the ropes and introduce me to all sorts of cool people and adventures. I choose Door 3, thank you Universe!

So, I’ll be dancing off to Panama in September to live and scope out areas for the Spa Retreat. I’ve been doing plenty of virtual traveling and now it’s time for me to really see and feel the areas. Then I’ll be able to provide more info for the Spa Retreat Birth Plan to present to my potential financiers. They are beautiful people but a little more “practically” minded than I. The Universe will provide and my Angels and Fairies are always taking care of me aren’t enough for them.

More adventures later……






Michelle Hazelwood has contributed to the elevation of the planet through motivating, training, and sharing the personal benefits of fitness with men and women throughout the United States since 1982.

Offering a high level of expertise to the Personal Training profession, Michelle brings years of certified qualifications to her clients. You can learn more about Michelle through her website: Universal Wellness

Singing for Change "Stand by Me"

Warren Buffett always KNEW he would be rich.

"I always knew I was going to be rich. I don't think I ever doubted it for a minute."

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Knowing + having no doubt = success.

Using your creative mind

An email request for help: "I have read books about asking, believing and visualizing. I’m continuously doing that. but sometimes I cant help doubting when go back to reality again. I’ve been looking for a job for 4 months now and Im still struggling. I tried following the the law of attraction but I think its not working on me. Help, I dont know where to start. Can we really control ourselves? Can we, through our thoughts, we can make things possible. All I want for now is to get a job. "

I have found that when people say that the Law of Attraction isn't working for them, its because they are spending more focus on what is NOT happening, or what they fear, rather than what they DO desire.

This is a normal habit until a new habit is created.

If you focus on what you want once a day, and then 20 times a day you focus on your fears, then what is getting the most attention will continue to be there for you.

Over the years, with my own life changing events and working with clients I have used Simple Key tools that help to clarify and re-focus.

Perhaps this Simple Key will assist you as well.

First - Write specifically WHAT you want. You must be specific.

You say you need to get a job. By focusing on “need”, you are focusing on fear. When you focus on fear, most people will settle for less than the best, or less than they deserve to have.

Start writing down what you desire in your perfect job:
How many days a week;
how many hours a day;
how far away from home;
what type of characteristics does your boss have (only good ones);
what are your duties (the ones you really enjoy);
how do you desire to feel everyday on your way to work;
how do you desire to feel every day on your way home from work;
what are the characteristics of your co-workers,
and everything about your perfect job as you desire it to be.

If you feel overwhelmed, then sit quiet for a moment and daydream. Place yourself in your daydream, three years down the road. Going this far down the road assists you in removing yourself from your fearful energy of today. See yourself as happy and fulfilled, living where you love, and working at your perfect job doing what you love. Suddenly you meet a friend you haven't seen in years, and she is excited about your life. She asks how you got this perfect job, and you tell her.

Because you are daydreaming, your logical mind (your fears and doubts) most likely will not kick in just yet. Your creative mind will answer. Whatever is the first thing you tell your friend is your answer, coming from your inner consciousness.

Once you have that - open your eyes and write down on your list what you told your friend in your daydream. Re-feel your joy from your daydream as you do this.

If the joy starts to creep away, your creative mind is being taken over by your fear, and STOP. Go outside and take a walk, exercise or something else physical and then come back and be quiet and with your list again.

Don't be concerned about exactly HOW it will happen. When you feel yourself getting fearful or doubtful again, read your list and revisit your daydream, re-feel the feelings of joy in your daydream.

When you do this you will find that your conscious mind, the time you spend in your reality, starts to notice new things, new opportunities; you start to hear things or read things you may have previously overlooked; your creative energy is in force.

I have a client who was broke and days from being evicted from her apartment. She used this tool and that afternoon when at the local market, she overheard a conversation where someone was looking for a housesitter for 6 months. She stepped into her courage, and approached the person. Within an hour she had a paying house sitting job and a new home for 6 months.

During that six months, she clarified what she really desired in her life, and using this and other Simple Key tools, she is now making more money than she ever had previously, and is living in a home at the beach.

As with any new habit, you may find this requires more effort at first, however, the more you use it the easier it becomes.

Others have what they desire in life - and you deserve yours as well.

I watched the movie ”Women” this weekend. In the movie (not spoiling the ending), the Meg Ryan character hits what she calls bottom, and finally asks herself ‘What Do I Want?”. She took out a black felt marker and wrote that question on the top of a page, and then went on to write down what she believed she wanted from the deepest recesses of herself. She went on to create a vision board.

After clarifying her wants, she took action. You have to see the movie to see how it turns out. It wasn’t without bumps in her road.

I have experienced that many people will give lip service to their wants or complain about what is not in their life. Some will write one thing or two, and when events don’t appear the way they specify, the focus on the list goes away. It is replaced with compromise or complaining or giving up.

One of my clients had a strong desire for her perfect boyfriend. She sat with me and wrote her list, starting with her 5 non-compromisable characteristics, those deal breakers. Next were listed items that were negotiable, and finishing her list with characteristics and appearances that would be nice.

Very quickly she met what she described at the perfect man. Within months they were exclusive and started living together. Almost immediately she witnessed a behavior in this man that was on her non-compromisable list. When she brought it to his attention, he told her he would change for her. Unfortunately his behavior did not change, in fact it escalated and he started telling her that she was too demanding. This woman was not willing to see how this non-compromisable item on her list was only a hope and not a commitment.

After two years of struggle, she left this man and went through a painful healing process. She pulled out her list again, and this time she was very clear about what was important to her. The short story is that she is now with a man who not only matches every characteristic on her list, he has the same non-compromisable items that she does. They are headed towards marriage, something they both desire to share with each other. She proudly tells people that she got everything on her list, with bonuses. This man brought new adventures into her life, she had not previously imagined.

I have a client who wants to expand her business with clients that fit a specific description. Every time she accepts a client “because she needs the money”, instead of focusing on clients that fit her perfect client as described on her list, she has problems. She continues to have money problems clients. Her “for the money” clients are taking the majority of her time and a few have asked for their money back.

These days I add Michael Phelps to my examples of how it works when you write it down. This year he revealed how he had a piece of paper, his intention list in his bedroom and after his remarkable wins at the Olympics in an interview with Bob Costas: “What was on that much talked about piece of paper? You wish list or your intention list?”
Phelps:” I think you saw it. It was all there, I think the only difference was the 200 fly, but other than that everything was pretty close to, pretty close to identical to what was written on the piece of paper.”

Knowing what you desire and are willing to be committed to is most important when writing this list. Being specific is critical. I hear the word “honesty” being placed on many non-compromisable lists. I always ask – what does honesty mean? Is honest defined as ALL the time, or is there a disclaimer when it comes to the IRS or telemarketers?? You must know the true definition of the words you choose to use.

What is on your list works when you place your commitment to your desires. Being conscious and taking conscious action is required. This works in all areas of life.
What type of life do you want?

What is non-compromisable in business, career, health, friends, relationships?

What is negotiable?

Write it down.